IF OPERATING SYSTEMS RAN THE AIRLINES

 

UNIX Airways

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the

airport. They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece

by piece, arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed

 to be building.

 

Air DOS

Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and

let the plane coast until it hits the ground again.  Then they push

again, jump on again, and so on ...

 

Mac Airlines

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look

and act exactly the same.  Every time you ask questions about details,

you are gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want

to know, and everything will be done for you without your ever having

to know, so just shut up.

 

Windows Air

The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy

baggage check and boarding, and a smooth take-off.  After about 10

minutes in the air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

 

Windows NT Air

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and

takes out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it

explodes.

 

Linux Air

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start

their own airline.  They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave

the runways themselves.  They charge a small fee to cover the cost of

printing the ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket

yourself.  When you board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts,

a wrench and a copy of the seat-HOWTO.html.  Once settled, the fully

adjustable seat is very comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on

time without a single problem, the in-flight meal is wonderful.  You

try to tell customers of the other airlines about the great trip, but

all they can say is, "You had to do what with the seat?"